PunkTorah

Independent Jewish Spirituality Online

What Gives Me the Right?

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I offer a lot of opinions on this blog (I think “opinions” and “blog” are almost synonymous). And a lot of the time, I stress out about it. Not just about whether I have my facts straight, or that what I’m saying deserves to be said.

I stress about how anyone could believe I have a right to spout off on Torah, Talmud, Judaism, etc?

A friend of mine has refused to attend our weekly dinner-and-Torah study for exactly that reason. They didn’t care to hear or express opinions on Torah – not because they felt those opinions were incorrect or un-important, but exactly the opposite. In their words,

“I have no right express an opinion about pythagorean theorum. You don’t either.  If you’re name is Stephen Hawking I’m interested in what you think, but otherwise shut up. Torah is the same. I want to know what Rashi thought, what Abrabanel thought. I want someone much smarter than me to take their words and pull them together into a coherent set of ideas that drives to a point. But I have no interest in whether someone at the dinner table ‘likes’ or ‘agrees with’ what the Torah is saying.”

While I can appreciate and respect that opinion, I can’t live by it. The learning my friend is talking – learning what the great Rabbis had to say – about is one important aspect of Torah, but another is the act of grappling with the ideas, of finding out who I am by hearing myself talk about the things Torah is saying.

Yeah, you read that right. Some people think before they speak. I think while I speak. Want to know what I believe? Ask me and wait for me to stop talking about it, and then ask me again. It’s just the way I’m wired.

I don’t confuse being able to ask a question with having all (or any) of the answers. As I’ve said here before, if you have a real question – a challenging issue which affects the way you will behave, then CYLR (Consult Your Local Rabbi) applies. But without starting the process of thinking about what you think, you’ll never even get that far.

That still doesn’t address my original point, though – what gives me the right to express those ideas here, in public? Why do I think that people should read/listen to me instead of using the time to read Heschel or Hertz or Hillel? Isn’t it arrogant of me to think that anyone (besides me, and maybe my dog) wants to hear what I have to say?

Recently Seth Godin addressed this idea in a piece titled (appropriately enough) Arrogant

“This is a fear and a paradox of doing work that’s important.

A fear because so many of us are raised to avoid appearing arrogant. Being called arrogant is a terrible slur, it means that you’re not only a failure, but a poser as well.
It’s a paradox, though, because the confidence and attitude that goes with bringing a new idea into the world (“hey, listen to this,”) is a hair’s breadth away, or at least sometimes it feels that way, from being arrogant.

And so we keep our head down. Better, they say, to be invisible and non-contributing than risk being arrogant.

That feels like a selfish, cowardly cop out to me. Better, I think, to make a difference and run the risk of failing sometimes, of being made fun of, and yes, appearing arrogant. It’s far better than the alternative.“

In 3 short paragraphs (I believe Seth doesn’t have a long-winded bone in his body. I am, to say the least, insanely jealous.) he both named my biggest fear (being exposed as the fraud I sometimes feel I am) and offered me a way past it.

I believe that what I am doing here on EdibleTorah is important. I believe the ideas I present here have helped people in their own journeys.

Reading Seth’s article also made me reflect on the reality. Nobody  – not a single person – has written to me privately or in the comments of a post to tell me that I was a fraudulent hack. So it’s time to let that one go.

Along with the regular weekly food invitation (which is still the core focus of this site), I’m going to keep putting my ideas out there. They might amount to nothing. But then again, they might not.

Kristin the Jewbie: Jewish Community + Some Homework For PunkTorah

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My English teacher insists that we try not to start off essays with questions. I can’t remember the exact reason why he tells us this, but it has prevented me from starting off this blog with what I was originally intending to say: “what is the one word that can almost sum up how Jews react with one another?” But I did work that question in nicely, didn’t I?

In case you’re wondering, the answer is “community”.  Community is the one word that best represents what happens when Jews get together and interact with one another. Think about it, how many times have you been in a room full of Jews, most of whom you hardly know, and you just felt at home? Plenty, right?

I went to a BBG meeting the other day (the girls division of the Jewish Youth Group BBYO), and there must have been 15+ girls there (and that wasn’t even the entire chapter. Some didn’t even come). They all greeted me warmly and spent the time trying to get to know me, and they all genuinely acted like they wanted to be my friend. In fact, they acted like we had already all been friends since forever. It was pretty awesome (and I say that because girls are usually catty and don’t get along well with the “new girl to the group”), and this whole experience got me thinking about all of the other times that I had felt at home with other Jewish people. There was the time I attended a new synagogue (actually, a few new ones, with all of the same results) and everyone greeted me with “Shabbat Shalom” and took the time to get to know me and how I had ended up at their shul, or the time I went to New York and ended up chatting up a fellow Jew about religion, etc.

It’s such an awesome thing to be a part of a community that actually acts like just that-a community. No matter where I’ve ended up in these past few months on my path of The Jewish Journey Less Taken I’ve always felt like old pals with other Jews that I have met. And that is such a great thing, isn’t it, to be a part of such a loving community when the rest of the word can feel so full of hate sometimes? And I must admit, not every religion (and yes, I realize this is generalizing) offers a feeling such as this. I was raised in a predominantly Christian household, and going to church or attending Christian youth groups (and trust me, I went to plenty of each) never felt quite as inviting as it does within the Jewish world.

My assignment for you is to go try out a new Jewish Group (such as something at the JCC, etc.) or go to a new shul and test this out. I can almost guarantee you that you’ll feel welcomed and loved, and you’ll walk out with a feeling of togetherness.

With so much love and adoration,

Kristin the Jewbie

(I would just like to add: Baruch Hashem that we are able to experience such a feeling of community among other Jewish people, because the absolute, pure awesomeness of it is truly beyond words.)

You’re not Jewing it Right!

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I had a friendly debate with a gentlemen I was meeting about what it means to be Jewish. He challenged my opinions, but I did not feel like he was being rude or even trying to convince me another way. This friendly exchange is rare, so I took to him pretty quickly.

As it turns out he asked me questions about my faith that I did not have concrete answers for. I mean, what seems like truth to me, does not always seem that way for someone else. I always feel Hashem, but I do not always have “proof” of Him. It makes it complicated when discussing with someone who has a different perspective, but again… I did like this conversation so I continued to entertain different thoughts.

Finally, it came down to this one conclusion I had. If someone does not like our faith they’re not “Jewing it right”. He was a bit perplexed when I said it so I explained:

To “Jew it right” you must do something that seems fulfilling to you in the realm of religion. Try and learn something for a Rabbi or a friend; join an organization or a temple or an organization within a temple! You must take that energy that comes from within and apply it spiritually and culturally. Once you are firm in your beliefs and practices (whatever they might be and from whatever sect you belong to *or don’t belong to*) then you will find inner peace and happiness with your relationship to Hashem. This concept is “Jewing it right”. The affirmation that there is 1 soul creator that wants praise and acknowledgment that steams from joy and fulfillment from His creations.

Overall the conversation went well, but I was also excited to see that within the dialogue I had really verbalized how being Jewish is not only something I am committed to, but something that really speaks to my nishama.

Be true to the streets-

Yentapunker

Jews Love To Argue

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Take an empty room and put two Jews in it. When they argue (and make no mistake, there will be an argument), you will hear a minimum of three opinions between them.

Why do Jews love to argue, and why does each of us take multiple perspectives on every issue?

Debaters (lawyers and politicians, when it comes to arguments, can be categorized as debaters) take up a position and argue that position, attempting to prove their singular point. He takes a stance.

A Jew, on the other hand, is not a debater. He is a thinker. I don’t need to cite from the liturgy to say this. I know this from my own experience in the Jewish community. We do not argue in order to make judgments, and though stubbornness is a quality many of us share, we embrace multiple perspectives. Hillel never called Shamai stupid or uneducated, because though they argued, they did not argue solely to prove a point.

Hillel taught that “one who does not study deserves to die” (Pirkei Avot 1:13). It is my contention that we study not to learn facts, to amass knowledge, or to be indoctrinated with Jewish values. The greatest rabbis, or Jews in general, were the thinkers: those who asked questions of the Torah, of the world, of their peers, and of themselves. They took up perspectives and did not isolate themselves in the cell of a singular ideology.

The next time you have an argument, watch what you say. Are you trying to prove something, or are you embracing the act of the thought process itself? Post your thoughts in the comment section below!

(This post is from our friend Daniel Lewis, a High School Senior out of Northern Cali. Thanks Daniel!)

 

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