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Should Jews Be Elitists?

For three years, I have been running PunkTorah. And in this time, I have come to realize that our issues as a greater community, not as PunkTorah, but as Klal Yisrael, have nothing to do with Reform, Orthodox, Hareidi, Reconstructionist, convert, born Jew, gay, straight, black, white or anything. It has to do with a fundamental question: who has the authority?

I am going to make a startling statement, but I believe it is true. I believe that for many in the Jewish community, the worship of God has been replaced with a worship of academia. And I have a sense that instead of directing our hearts at the Divine, we direct our hearts instead at substitutionary idols like Jewish continuity and education-for-the-sake-of-nothing.

I don’t blame any one group or person for this. Rabbis aren’t to blame. Institutions are to blame. But a system wide epidemic is to blame. I call this collective social disease Meritocracy.

Meritocracy, in its simplest explanation, is the belief that those who have achieved the greatest amount of merit are the ones who should lead. On the outside, this makes a lot of sense. Why would you want someone who doesn’t know anything and hasn’t accomplished anything to become a leader? It sounds like the antidote to all the things we hate: inherited leadership, financial oligarchy, etc.

The problem is this: how do we measure merit? Judaism has some interesting insights into this.

God chooses people to lead, and not because they are especially meritous. Noah was a “righteous man in his time” (Genesis 6:9). Rabbis of old thought this was a bit of a “stab” at Noah. Remember, the whole world is about to be destroyed for being evil. Noah wasn’t righteous. He was righteous for his time. He was good enough, given the world he lived in.

The same is true for Moses. Midrash Exodus Rabbah 2:2 says that God picked Moses to lead the Hebrews because he was a shepherd. He cared for his father in law Yitro’s animals and the kind of qualities that brings out in a person, such as love, patience and leadership, are the kinds of values that a hero needs. Moses was otherwise a murdering stutterer who often rebuked God and suffered from wild anger and bouts of depression.

There are many other examples of this. King David was such an unlikely candidate for leader that when the prophet Samuel asked Jesse to bring his sons so that God could decide through Samuel who should be the next king, David was not even included. When Samuel questioned Jesse how many sons he had (since God didn’t want any of his other songs), Jesse seemed confused. He says something to the effect of “well, I do have one other son, the youngest one. But seriously? He’s out in the field somewhere with the sheep. Why would you want that son?” (1 Samuel 6). I could continue on, but there are many more issues to discuss.

While Judaism teaches that we should find a teacher and a friend (Avot 1:6), in practical terms, most of the knowledge we gain is not from time spent at a desk, learning what we need to know before we act. Most learning, the learning that makes us who we are, comes from experiencing the moments when everything we know fails us! This is why, I believe, the Torah says that we should “do” and then “learn” (Exodus 24:6-7) as opposed to learning, then doing, which seems to make more sense.

Or does it? If we sat around all day learning how to act, we would never have the time to actually do something and learn from our mistakes. This is part of the reason why converts to Judaism are not supposed to be overwhelmed with learning before conversion (see Babylonian Talmud, Yevamot 47b). If we told people to learn, learn, and learn some more until they are Jewish enough, they could never convert, because learning is life long.

God, it seems, trusts this “do first, then learn” process, which is why God chose us to be a nation of priests (Exodus 19:6). Judaism does not say that we should be a nation of a few priests, with everyone else underneath. This is a distortion of the kohanim, who by the way, were not the intellectual elite: they were men who happened to be born into a family whose job it was to tend to sacrifices. While this would have been a point of honor, the honor of tending to the dead, to butchering meat, to teaching others, are all on an equal level. Bottom line: there is no one better in Judaism. We’re all the same, no matter what our job title.

Spiritual meritocracy is one thing. But there is another issue that may be more important, given the fact that fewer and fewer Jews are going to synagogue. What do we make of the people in “secular” Jewish institutions, which many of us feel removed from? Again, the same rule applies: there is no one greater or lesser in Judaism. It’s also important to look at the motivations of these organizations. I had one non-profit organizer tell me, “we don’t care what Jews do. We just want them to identify as Jewish. We want to know that fifty years from now, today’s Jewish children won’t be Catholics.” The idea of Jewish continuity, that Jews are an ethnocultural group devoid of anything else is more heretical than anything I have ever posted on PunkTorah. But for many, it is the operating mantra.

The Torah warns us many, many times about this kind of attitude. God does care what we do (the incident of the Golden Calf being a fairly straight forward example). And frankly, the belief that we are a closed off society that needs to be protected from itself is ahistorical. Midianites, Moabites, Canaanites and many others (including the mixed multitude of Egypt) became part of the Jewish people. Your ancestors at Mount Sinai were not just Hebrew slaves in Egypt, but all the other people who wanted to take part in the creation of a new civilization based on the One God. And our messiah comes from one of those people, Ruth the Moabite. While Jews are meant to be or l’goyim, the light to the other nations, it is a bizarre and frankly shocking idea that the way to achieve this is through a desperate pseudo-racial paranoia that removes Judaism from Jewish life and Jewish life from any context other than survivalism.

What does this have to do with meritocracy? Simple put, many wealthy organizations operate under this false, non-religious, ahistorical attitude. It creates a meritocracy where a wealthy elite are in charge of preventing the annihilation of the Jewish people that seems to always be lurking around the corner. Out of our deep seated fear of our own destruction, which blamelessly comes from the horror and shock of the Holocaust, we have put a lot of stock into this lowest-common-denominator way of maintaining Jewish community. But since it is not based on God, the Torah, the Jewish people as having anything to contribute to the world or anything else in Jewish principal, it is over time doomed to failure and frankly is transparent.

So if you agree with anything that I have stated, we are left with one question: what do we do to stop it? I have a few simple ideas:

Take Action – when you see a situation where elitism is being used to deny someone’s Judaism, stop it. Fight. Be a rebel. If you read PunkTorah, I assume this isn’t a problem for you. But fear, including the fear of being the lone voice of reason, can be intimidating. Don’t give up!

Use Love As the Litmus Test – when you consider putting your faith into someone or something, ask yourself what the motivation of that person or organization is. Are they interested in the kind of open, dynamic Jewish life that you believe in, or are they appealing to something else, like fear? When love, and not power, control, and anxiety becomes the pillar on which Jewish life is built, it will stand until Eternity.

Make Demands – Jewish leaders and organizations belong to the Jewish people. Rabbis don’t lead synagogues: they are contract workers, like the person who paves your driveway. You are in charge. So demand that elitism be taken out of your community

Support Goodness – there are hundreds of wonderful Jewish leaders who believe what we believe. The ones that live on the margins of Jewish life, the ones doing the grunt work to make Heaven on Earth, are the ones that we need to cling to. These are the outsiders, the freaks, the independent thinkers, the people that are not occupying the high seats of Jewish academia or prestige. Find these people, and love them.

Ditch the System – there is a belief that we can “work within the system”, building bridges, and trying to make the world better with the resources that others have. I am convinced this will not work. All radical movements that work manage to do it because they offer something else, something unique, and people will awake from their collective slumber to the reality of its shining beauty. So ditch the system. Don’t repair something that, when fixed, still won’t work. Do something new. If you must work in the system, or you see something good about being in it, then don’t let it white wash you. I have seen this happen. There are; however, many resilient personalities that do buck that trend, and I am proud to see these people band together.

Radically Love – people are not to blame for the meritocracy, the system is. And once we ditch the system (and that can mean different things to different people), we need to radically love. Love always attracts others. Fear, hostility, exclusion, and a superiority complex are no way to gain friends or influence others long term. But intense, passionate love for humanity and for God always win.

Ken yehi ratzon. May it be HaShem’s will.

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That Darn Wicked Child

As we stand at the edge of what is arguably the biggest night in the Jewish calendar, I wanted to share one bit of learning I picked up this weekend from a local Rabbi.

We all have people in our lives who resemble the Rasha – the wicked child of those famous 4 children who make their appearance at this time of year. Heck, at one time or another (or many) in our lives we may even BE the wicked child: the one who is completely disaffected and disconnected; who stands apart – from the seder, from the family, from Judaism itself.

Reading through the four children, we GET this bad-boy of the seder.

So (asked the Rabbi), what is he DOING there? I mean, most people who don’t buy into Passover, or the seder, or Judaism don’t show up in the first place! But there he his, sitting with his sneer next to the Chocham (the wise child) and making snide remarks under his breath.

Methinks he doth protest too much.

I used to teach a parent-child class at my synagogue, to help kids prepare to write the d’var Torah for their Bar/Bat Mitzvah. There would always be one or two kids who would make all kinds of comments – to the embarrassment of the parent seated next to them. In response to the inevitable parental apologies, I would tell that parent it was more than OK – it was my pleasure. See, the kids could only make those comments if they were listening in the first place. As long as they were listening, I knew we were on the right track.

Ditto the wicket child. He’s there. He’s listening. He’s asking questions. What do his actions tell us, versus his words?

Another point the Rabbi brought up was that the Rabbis who structured the Haggadah put those kids in order of importance. Second only to the wise child, the wicket child is considered more favored than the simple child or the one who doesn’t know what to ask. I leave it to you to ponder why.

And my final item to share, in the hopes it sparks conversation around your table tonight: Those four children could easily represent the course of American immigration and assimilation. The wise child is our grandparents, who arrived here from Europe knowing all the traditions and rules they learned in the shtetle overseas. The wicked child is the first generation American, trying hard to distance themselves from all traces of “foreign-ness”. The next generation asks their (wicked) parent “What’s is that?” to which they are told “Be quiet. Bubbie’s crazy.”

And fourth generation (third generation American) is the child who doesn’t know how to ask. Far from a tragedy, this child is open to learn the fullness of our tradition fresh and new, if only we are willing to keep modeling these strange customs and weird holidays, providing experiences to learn and discover…

…until the moment when they start asking their own questions.

Chag Sameach Pesach

Originally posted here.

 

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Seder Plate Sets Available at PunkTorah.org

We are now sold out of seder plates. Thank you so much for your support! To continue supporting PunkTorah, please click on this link to donate.

We have two unique seder plates with free shipping available at PunkTorah for our Passover Fundraiser. Click the image above to zoom in!

Each seder plate is made up of a gorgeous chocolate brown main plate and six small, robin’s egg blue dishes. Included in the set is a haggadah (haggadot type will vary) and a black, hand knitted kippah! The plate is obviously for your Passover seder, but can be separated into multiple dishes for chip/dip, tapas or other serving dish year round.

Shipping is free and 100% of the proceeds go to benefit PunkTorah.org. The seder plate set with haggadah and hand crochet kippah is only $56.99.


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Free Haggadot From PunkTorah and OneShul

Need haggadot for Passover? At PunkTorah’s office, we have TONS of random haggadot (Passover booklets) including Maxwell House and 30 Minute Seder that we want you to have for your Passover celebration!

We are now completely out of haggadot. We are so thrilled that we could help so many people.

Still need haggadot? You can download the haggadah from the OneShul siddur, Ahavah Rabbah, free by clicking here. The service starts on page 92.

Want to do a mitzvah? Please click on the link below to donate $6.99 to PunkTorah to help pay for the cost of shipping all the haggadah orders we received.

TZEDAKAH HAGGADOT

Have a wonderful Passover!

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Our First Jewish Conversion Book! Pre-Order or Submit Your Essays

We’re excited to announce the start of our new book, “The Jewish Convert Handbook”. In this book, you will discover what it really means to convert to Judaism, the myths and facts about conversion, the secret history of converts to Judaism, and all the dirty secrets your rabbi doesn’t want you to know! Plus, our book will contain the true stories of converts in the PunkTorah community and beyond. Available in print and in eBook format, this is the only conversion book you will ever need!

The book will be available late May. But we need your help!

We need your conversion story. Submit it before April 16th to patrick@punktorah.org. We also need volunteer editors. So if you are painfully aware of spelling and grammar rules, this gig is for you.

You can pre-order the printed book for $16.99 and receive an honorable mention on the first page! Pre-orders are made via Paypal. Click here to make your donation. Thank you!

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Parsha Ki Tisa: Right Belief by the Right Brigade (Ex. 30:11 – 34:35)

Well. . . Our people are up to their old ways this week. Not only do the ancient Hebrews convince themselves that Hashem and Moses have abandoned them once again, they also plead with Aaron to smelt another golden calf. All this happens after the community is asked to pay half a sheckle in tithes while Bezalel and Oholiab start to craft the past few week’s commandments into physicality. Throw in a commandment to always honor Shabbat and you have a lot of invested effort making a walk away from Hashem highly unlikely.

On the surface so many things take place in Ki Tisa one can very easily come away feeling overwhelmed. If that is not enough to make you say “Woah” just beneath the surface the depths of meaning are endless. If you have yet to read this week’s portion , stop right here and go and do it! Fear not I will be right hear where you left me.

Choices, choices, choices…seriously where to begin? Better to choose just one lesson and run, right? Right! Ki Tisa shows us that being Jewish is easier than it seems. Judaism is simply choosing Hashem and His traditions. That latter part has really been expounded upon throughout the centuries but the former remains as is. The anger in this week’s portion exuded verbally by Hashem and Moses and physically by Levitical sword stems from a heart piercing betrayal by the ancient Hebrews. Once again they chose to turn their backs to Hashem and their faces towards a golden calf. Hardly a coincidence then that Moses sees the back of Hashem and then begins to cover his face with a vale.

Three thousand men are figuratively and literally cut from Judaism for two specific reasons. First, this is the second time their hearts yearned for an inanimate god and second the ancient Hebrew’s society was the first true state of Israel. The Hebrew Tribes were surrounded by non-nomadic people worshiping man made divinity, simply put nothing was stopping those slain from leaving the tribe for more “golden” pastures. They chose to stay, stray, and hope for the day when their agenda was the majority one.

Today drawing swords and cleaning the proverbial house is antiquated to say the least, but that doesn’t mean we can’t turn inwards and cut out those things that are foreign parasites feeding off our sparks. Judaism like ever other religion is not hyphenated you can not choose Hashem and attach a belief in other deities to your faith. If you feel called to another faith don’t be hindered by your upbringing or family name, if you allow that to happen your diminishing yourself and the Jewish faith. In essence go and be the best practitioner you can be.

Learning about and from others is crucial to a fearless and fulfilling life but at some point you have to be true to your spark. The many traditions within Judaism often times seem at odds with each other over Halakha but choosing Hashem and Hashem only is the lynchpin that keeps us who we are.

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Jewishness, Genealogy and Apples For Some Reason

I’m not sure how many of you watch those genealogy shows on TV – you know the ones I mean, the shows that follow celebrities about as they wander Europe discovering that they’re descended from royal families and villains. Well, I’d always watched those shows with a degree of fascination and envy. There have always been massive gaps in our family history. My mother was adopted, and my paternal grandfather abandoned my father and his mother when he was still just a baby. So I spent years wondering about all the crazy people I could be related to. In a way, I suppose we look to those that have gone before us for guidance. The apple never falls far from the tree (as the saying goes), and I guess it can be useful to know what variety of apple you are before running off and preparing dessert.

Anyway, after years of not knowing anything about my mother’s family, we finally discovered that we’re the type of apple you get in lokshen. (See? The apple analogy was totally going somewhere! It surprised even me, to be honest.)

At least, we’re probably the sort of apple you get in a tasty Jewish dessert. We definitely have Hebrew blood. At the very least, we’re kosher apple pie. My mother is quite happy at being apple pie. I, on the other hand, would quite like to be a lokshen-grade apple. I’ve always been spiritual, and I’ve developed a pretty good relationship with G_d (we talk regularly, and I don’t sulk with him as much as I used to). I also love Judaism. I read my Torah portion every week, and honestly, I think I’d cry if a rabbi told me to go back to being apple pie.

So in order to discover the extent of our Jewishness and to learn a little more about my maternal family heritage, I wrote to a rabbi at one of Birmingham’s synagogues (this was back in December 2011). I explained my mother’s adoption story, the information we’d uncovered regarding our Jewishness, and then asked if I could visit the synagogue and perhaps sit in on a service. The rabbi wrote back and was quite lovely. He said he was touched to read my family’s story, and said that we could join in with the shul’s activities once we’d shown him the documentation that proved we were Jewish.

…And there’s my stumbling block. ‘All you have to do is prove you’re Jewish’. For someone as neurotic and as anally retentive as me, this was (and still is) a nightmare. But I still want to visit the shul, and to be honest, I think I need the rabbi’s validation. It would be nice to sit down and hear a rabbi say, “Emma, you’re a big Jew.” It would overcome all doubt and would also give my mother and I a connection to something beyond ourselves. We’ve both always felt like outsiders for one reason or another, and so to belong to something that we both feel an affinity for would be amazing!

This led me to discover just how strict people can be about the idea of Jewish identity. You can’t marry in Israel unless you can produce really watertight documentation to demonstrate that you , your mother and your mother’s mother were all Jewish. They want ketubah and bar mitzvah documents and all sorts! If you want to live in Israel, then you can’t have a great-great-great-grandmother that converted to Judaism. (I read somewhere that they’re even conducting DNA tests now, but this might just be an Internet concocted work of fiction…) I have no ketubah and no bar mitzvah documents. Nothing. Until a few years ago, my mother didn’t even have a photograph of her own mother! I’m sure you can imagine the quiet (yet messy) little melt-down I had upon reading all of this. But then I reasoned that I don’t really want to move to Israel (I’m perfectly adapted to British weather – cold, wet and windy), and my partner isn’t Jewish anyway, so why marry in Israel? Keep calm and carry on, Emma.

So I then wondered what kind of proof a rabbi would actually want. I mean, I’ve found enough to satisfy myself that I’m pretty Jewish, and I can be seriously difficult to convince! But I’m not a rabbi. I don’t know what the criteria are. I did find an encouraging piece online that was written by a Jewish lady who was in a very similar situation to my own. But then she didn’t list the type of documentation she had in her possession. Perhaps she had more than me. Perhaps her mother’s mother’s maiden name was Cohen – that would have been just too convenient, wouldn’t it?! I fantasised about finding a Cohen or a Levy whilst researching my family tree. But no. All the women in my family are awkward! (Which I like, to be honest! We’re awkward, which in my world is synonymous with ‘interesting’.)

So basically, I would be happy to put myself into a tasty Jewish dessert, but would the rabbi agree? I’m writing this in a pretty light-hearted way, but this has become extremely important to me. I’ve now collated all the information I could unearth. I’ve explored every familial avenue I could find, and it keeps coming back Hebrew (to me at least).

For instance, I’ve found that three generations of my family lived in the Jewish Quarter of Birmingham during the Victorian era. (Some of them were also there back in the Georgian era.) There was my great-grandmother, great-great-grandmother and great-great-great-grandmother, along with their husbands and in-laws. All the family names I’ve found have strong Jewish connections, and I also discovered that before moving to Birmingham, the various branches of the family all orbited a place called Stroud in Gloucestershire. (Stroud once had a thriving Jewish community, and even possessed a synagogue and Jewish cemetery.) I even found DNA projects for my grandmother’s and great-great-grandmother’s families. The results from both revealed the primary haplotype to be J2, which places them in the Mediterranean and Fertile Crescent regions. They both also possessed the J1 haplotype to a lesser extent, and that places both branches in Torah Country. The documentation I’d previously uncovered revealed that both families have Sephardic roots, and the DNA results would seem to confirm it! So I suppose it’s all looking good!

But there’s a catch. (There’s always a catch!) During my genealogical adventures, I’ve also learned how wildly protective some Jewish communities can be of their cultural heritage, to some I guess it might even seem elitist. I can understand why this is, of course I can. The Jewish people have been scattered across the world, enslaved, and persecuted time and again. The only way for a people to survive that kind of hardship and maintain a cohesive culture is by adhering closely to its traditions and precepts – to be protective of it. However, it can be very daunting and hard for those trying to find a way in – or back in. If I don’t meet the rabbi’s prerequisite level of Jewishness, then I have to go back to being kosher apple pie, which would frankly break my little heart.

Still, I’ve started on this journey now and I’m quite determined to finish it. I emailed the rabbi’s PA on Sunday (yes, the rabbi has a PA) and asked for an appointment. Which is what he asked me to do back in December. So very soon, the verdict should be in! (Next Tuesday at 11am, to be precise.) The question is, is Emma Jewish enough to call herself a Jew?

Emma Holton
20th February 2012

(You want to know the really scary thing? …I haven’t even learned anything about my paternal grandfather’s family yet! Can you imagine…)

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Young Jewish Professionals? NO MORE!

Young, Jewish professional is an insulting, loaded term that the Jewish community needs to do away with.

Before PunkTorah became a non-profit, Jewish multimedia company and hub for independent Jewish spirituality, I often went on diatribes about young Jewish professionals. I mentioned how much I hate the term in PunkTorah’s latest book and probably the third most read article on PunkTorah is about the secret language of these strange beasts.

Problem is, I’ve become one.

Yes, I am a young, Jewish professional. I run a Jewish non-profit. I am becoming a rabbi. I am a lay spiritual leader at the world’s only online, independent chavurah. I find myself in-and-out of the young, Jewish professional “scene” and I have to admit, I am normally able to hold-my-own in a crowd, but these suit and tie, business card flashing, hair gel coma inducing events of romantic hookups and business deals give me panic attacks and warm thoughts about psychiatric drug commercials. I recall one event I went to at a college, where in the intensity of name tags, Jewish Geography and let’s-take-an-arial-photo-of-us-on-my-Smartphone-so-I-can-publish-it-to-the-young-Jewish-professionals-Facebook made me want to run to the bathroom and hold myself in the fetal position until it all blew over like some kind of Yiddish tornado swallowing up the town.

Obviously I have strong feelings about this. So I made a YouTube video about it. Enjoy.

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Proof That Miracles Exist…MUST WATCH!

Want to make miracles for thousands of people online everyday? Please donate to PunkTorah.org via Paypal.

 

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Taste & See Conversion Comic: It’s Strange…

The next installment in Laura Cooper’s Jewish conversion comic, Taste & See…

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